This month I am doing something I have never done before. I am writing this article based on a questionnaire. This questionnaire was answered by 72 homeschooling Moms. I love to "pick the brains" of other homeschooling mothers. I like the verse in Proverbs that says, "There is much wisdom in many counselors". I find this to be especially true in the area of homeschooling. Of course, God does not lead every family to homeschool in the same way, but I was able to "glean" something from so many of these Moms that returned the questionnaire. Below are the questions, my summary of the responses and what I learned.

1) How many children do you have and how old are they?

This question was to satisfy my own curiosity. As most of you know, homeschooling families often have a larger than "normal" family. However, several of the families also had two or three children. I did hear from two Moms who have an only child and one Grandma who is homeschooling her grandson.

2) How long have you homeschooled your children?

Summary: Most of the Moms who participated in the questionnaire have homeschooled the whole way, though several did have their children in private or public school for awhile. Several Moms answered this question with the words "Since birth" and that point was well taken. 

3) At what age do your children generally begin their formal education? Does this vary with each child?

Summary: Nearly everyone that responded said that they begin their child's education at the age of five. However, some parents start at age 3 and others wait until their child is 8 or 9 years old. Many parents have their child start when they feel he is ready and, of course, this varies with each child. One Mother of 10 taught one child to read at age 3 and another at age 8, which is when she felt each of the children were ready. Most of her children were about 5 or 6 years old when they began their formal education, though. 

What I learned: I learned that the majority of children start school at the traditional school age of 5. Most of the veteran homeschooling Moms strongly advised waiting until the child is showing signs of being ready for school. We already practice the "better late than never" philosophy but this was a good reminder to be patient. 

4) Do you have specific hours that you homeschool your children or do you incorporate it into your lifestyle? 

Summary: About 3/4s of the Moms said that they have specific hours that they "do school". The other 1/4 incorporate learning into every day living. Many in the first category also incorporate a lot of learning into their lifestyle even during non-school hours. Nearly everyone that answers takes advantage of those "teachable moments". 

What I learned: It is good to have some kind of routine to the day but take advantage of every "teachable moment"  throughout the day. If one of my children asks me, "Did the Mayas and Incas live at the same time?", (this happened this morning), I need to take the time to help him find the answer even if it is not school hours and even if we are not covering Central and South American history in our curriculum.

5) What led you to homeschool your children?

Summary: Without exception, everyone included God in their answer. Everyone felt that they were homeschooling because God led them in that direction. Many felt that the parent's teaching their children was the only biblical answer to their child's education. Many Moms did list other benefits such as financial (cheaper than a public school) and more convenient.

What I Learned: It was very refreshing to learn how many families desired to do God's will for their family, even if it went against the "norm" in today's society. 

6) Do you use a specific method of homeschooling (such as Classical, Unit Studies, textbooks, unschooling, Charlotte Mason, notebooks, etc) or do you use a combination of methods? Why do you use this method? 

Summary: Obviously, there were many answers to this question. Over half of the Moms said they use textbooks such as Bob Jones or Abeka. Several Moms said they use the living books approach, the classical method, do Unit Studies or a combination of these things. Two wrote back that they "unschool". 

What I learned: The Lord has called all of these women to homeschool their children but He has led each of them to do it in a different way. No one family homeschools their child EXACTLY like another family. 

7) Briefly describe a typical day in your family's life (on a school day, of course).

Summary: This is a hard one to summarize. Every family was so different.  One thing I did find, though, is that most families had a routine. Some had very rigid schedules and some just did "what comes next" but most families had some sort of order to what they did each day. 

What I learned: Once again I learned that every homeschooling family is different!

8) If you could start over again in your homeschooling endeavor, what would you do differently? 

Summary: The vast majority of Moms said one of two things: 1) they wish they had been more relaxed and less demanding with all their children and/or 2) they wish they had not pushed their firstborn so hard. Many Moms also regretted that they had not taken the time to enjoy the "little things" more. They wish they had taken the time to play with their children, read more to their children, and listened more to their children. They wish they would have backed off for awhile instead of pushing when their child struggled with reading or math concepts. Other Moms wish they are started with the curriculum they are using now. 

What I learned: I learned that many homeschooling Moms have exactly the same regrets I do! So, you first time  homeschooling Moms, relax, enjoy your children and lighten up on that poor firstborn! 

9) What do you consider to be the biggest successes of your homeschool?

Summary: There were many, many answers to this question. Here are the ones that were mentioned most often: 

     1. We are being obedient to the Lord and there is no better place to be.

     2. Our family is closer.

     3. My child learned to read!

     4. We are keeping our children from negative social pressure.

     5. Everything our child is taught is based on Scripture.

What I learned: There are many successes in homeschooling. Nearly all the reasons mentioned are true in our family as well. It can be easy to dwell on the negative ("Will he ever learn to read?", "Will he ever learn his multiplication tables?') and it was encouraging to read all the successes that other Mom's have had because so many of them applied to our family but I had not thought of them.

10) Please finish this statement: "I am glad we homeschool because...."

I think the best thing to do to summarize the answers to this question is to give actual quotes from some of the Moms.

1. "I am with my children all the time and I really love their company. We are building relationships to last a lifetime. On purpose."

2. "Obeying God is the best thing in the world."

3. "I am glad we homeschool because...." I can not imagine sending my children off for most of the day for someone else to raise. I feel like we are better able to instill our values in them because of the amount of time we spend together. I think it makes our family stronger. And most importantly, I feel that it is what God wants for us at this time, so we are being obedient to Him.

4.  "...this is what God wants me to do and I will joyfully obey Him. I love it and feel closer to God and to my family."

5. "I am the one who controls the outside influences."

6. "...of the relationships they are building between sibling and parents that will last a lifetime, hopefully against all the trials and storms that will come their way in life as they build each other up in love."

7. "I can stay on a topic as long as needed for my child to get it, no matter now long it takes!"

8. "We are all learning and growing together in wisdom and knowledge, and growing closer to one another and God."

It was a joy to read the responses from all these other homeschooling Moms. Every response that I received blessed me or taught me something. Let us, as homeschoolers, remember to uphold each other in prayer each and every day.

If you feel it would be an encouragement or a blessing to someone, you have the Stilwell's permission to forward this article in its entirety. They just ask that you include this note at the bottom of the article with their name and e-mail address (Jeff and Kim Stilwell, jkstilwell@juno.com) in case someone wishes to contact them. Thank you.

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