When I think of all the mothers in the Bible, the one that most often comes to my mind is Hannah. Perhaps because I, too, once struggled with the heartache of infertility, I feel a "kinship" with her. Several times a year I find myself turning to the beginning of I Samuel to read her story. The phrase in I Samuel 1 that I especially love is "For this child I prayed..." In fact we even have a plaque in our hallway, that has a picture of a mother holding her baby, with that phrase on it. "For this child I prayed..." Those are such meaningful, precious words to me. Like Hannah, I can say those words about each of my children. With a history of infertility and miscarriage, I prayed fervently for each of my children even before they were conceived. The prayers increased even more from the moment I would learn I was pregnant. Usually my prayers would begin with, "Please, please let us keep this little one." but within a few days I would be able to pray, "Not my will but Thine. If you want this little one in Heaven with you than so be it." However, I could never help adding, "But if it is Your will, please let us keep this little one."

Eight of our little ones were spared from ever living in this sinful earth and were taken straight from my womb to Heaven. After each loss my heart felt torn into a thousand pieces but, through the tears, I would always reach the point where I could honestly say, "The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." 

We are blessed in getting to raise five little ones here on earth. I look at these five precious children and wonder what plans God has for them. Why these five? Why are they are with my husband and the other eight in Heaven. However, I never wonder for long. I just trust in God's Sovereignty and His plan for each of them. Often, though, when I tuck the children into bed I look into the three pairs of hazel eyes and the two pairs of blue ones and I think, "For this child I prayed..." My prayers certainly did not stop when after they were safely born. If anything they increased all the more. I have a specific time of the day when I pray for each of my children. Some prayer requests are for all five children. Most of all I pray they will all receive Christ as their Savior. I also pray they will develop godly character. I pray they will be caught when they sin so that the sin can be corrected. I pray, Lord willing, they will have the joy of a happy marriage and children. I pray they and their spouse will remain pure for each other. I pray they would develop friendships with godly children. 

I also have individual prayers for each child. When one of my children is struggling with a specific sin such as dishonesty or sinful anger, I pray for them. When one of my children are hurting, physically or emotionally, I pray that God will help them grow closer to Him during their trial. When one of my children are struggling with speech development or math or any other important life skill, I pray for them. As I mentioned, I have a specific time that I pray for my children but I also pray for them through out the day. When I hear two of them squabbling, I pray that they can work it out between themselves in a biblical manner (and occasionally that actually happens!!). When one of my children comes up and gives me a hug, I will pause and thank God for that child. When one of them asks me a question, I quickly pray for wisdom. When I know they are about to face a difficult situation, I pray for them. 

However, even though I often pray for my children, both at during my private Bible reading and prayer time and throughout the day, nothing brings me to my knees as quickly as thinking about their future. When I think of wrong choices my children could make as young adults that could scar them for life, I pray for them. When I think of what our country will be like in twenty years if it continues it's downward spiritual spiral, I pray for my children. When I think of the horrors of this world and how it could affect my children, I can't help but turn to God in prayer for them. 

Being a mother is such a sweet, painful, joyful thing. There is nothing like it in this world. No human, except for perhaps the father, can know and love her children like a mother. There is nothing like the prayer of a mother.

Right now, as I type this, I am holding our youngest child, a two year old little girl, on my lap. (In fact I just saved what I have written so far in case she hits a key and erases it all.). She is "singing" and looking at a book. At this moment she looks like the epitome of all that is sweet and fresh and precious in this world. I had to stop typing for a minute to hold her close. "For this child I prayed..."

If you feel it would be an encouragement or a blessing to someone, you have the Stilwell's permission to forward this article in its entirety. They just ask that you include this note at the bottom of the article with their name and e-mail address (Jeff and Kim Stilwell, jkstilwell@juno.com) in case someone wishes to contact them. Thank you.

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