Help for New Christians

by Tom Bush, December 24, 2003

This article was written by Tom in response to a fellow believer who was struggling with typical new-Christian problems:  Is God really listening when I pray?  What should I read in my Bible? and more.  Our prayer is that his advice will help you, too!

I have been told that you are newly saved in Christ and are struggling with your faith right now.  Believe me, I know what you are going through because I was there (and am still there to a certain extent.)  I know what it's like to be a new Christian and to have doubts and struggles about my newly found faith.  I also know what it is like not to have a lot of other saved people around you on a consistent basis.  It is very lonely, and my newly accepted faith got undermined a great deal by the "world".  It is my sincere hope that the things I say in this letter will be helpful to you.  You have made the first important step in the beginning of a journey that will transform your life and assure you of an eternal home with our loving God in heaven above.

Let me begin by telling you a little bit about how I came to accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.  I grew up in a Catholic home, and of course, I never heard anything about the gospel of Jesus Christ because Catholics are discouraged from reading the Bible.  Quite simply, we were Catholic because my parents were Catholic and that was their answer to me.  That was the extent of my theological understanding of religion. (I use the word "religion" because Catholicism is truly a religion as opposed to a faith, which is what Christianity is.  It is founded on man-made traditions and rituals ("sacraments") which give no recognition to God and His purposes for man and our salvation.)  Essentially, my growing-up and young-adult years were devoid of any true knowledge of God and His plan of salvation for humanity.

Believe it or not, in all those years, I never heard the gospel of Jesus Christ presented to me in any way, shape, or form.  Jesus and God were taken totally for granted in my life.  I had no inherently negative feelings toward God.  He was just irrelevant to my thought process and my life.  He was just "there".  It was pure indifference rather than hostility.  Sure, I would "pray" to God for such and such a thing.  If I didn't get what I wanted, I became angry and was convinced that God was "punishing" me.  I viewed God as a cosmic genie that existed only to grant me my desired wishes.

Flash forward to me at age 27 in April 2000.  I was at a conference in Philadelphia having dinner at the Hard Rock Cafe restaurant with a couple of co-workers of mine.  Unbeknownst to me, these two friends were Bible-believing Christians.  We were talking about life, and the topic gradually drifted to politics, religion, and God.  I talked to these friends about growing up Catholic and confided to them how I had not been to Catholic mass in 10 years.  They began to share their faith with me.  Over the next hour or so, I learned some interesting yet troubling things.  In fact, I learned some pretty horrifying things, namely that I could not get into heaven outside of the saving grace of Jesus.  Not surprisingly, I initially got offended at what they were saying, so I finished dinner and went back to my hotel room.

Upon returning home, I told my mom what had gone on with this conversation.  She assured me that God would welcome me into heaven because, in her words, "Good people go to heaven, and bad people go to hell."  This "re-assuring" talk was accompanied by a condescending pat on the arm.  Phew!  I sure was relieved to know that!  Thank goodness my mom set me straight!  But, still doubt lingered.

Periodically, over the next year, I would have lunch with Vicki, one of the friends who witnessed to me in Philly, and I would invariably ask her lots of questions about the Bible, God, and Jesus.   At this point, it was more of an intellectual pursuit because in all my years of Catholic mass, I had never heard any of these things.  Imagine how interested I was to know that Jesus actually had siblings!  As such, I would pump her for as much information as I could.

In February 2001, I began a long-distance email and telephone friendship with Kaylene, who is now my wife.  Upon our first meeting in an online chat room, she immediately sensed that I was someone searching for answers in life.  Just four days after we first spoke, she mailed me my first Bible.  Over the next few months, my relationship with Kaylene deepened.  She spent many, many nights on the phone witnessing to me about the gospel.  For every question I had, she had a ready answer and the Scriptural references to back it up!  She was so proficient and well versed in the Bible that it was almost scary!  I marveled at her knowledge.  Later, she revealed to me that the things she told me were from God because even she didn't realize how much she really knew!

Finally, on July 22, 2001, I accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as my Savior.  My life has never been the same since (and in a good way, of course.)  We got married in February 2002, and she moved up here to Indiana.  My spiritual growth has been up and down as we have faced some difficult circumstances, many of which were of my own making.  But, that's a different story altogether.  Nevertheless, things are going pretty well right now, and my spiritual life has been growing steadily.  This is due in large part to the patience and love of my kind and caring wife who is an enormous gift to me and has been an immeasurable help to me in the growth of my spiritual life.

One of the biggest problems I faced (and still do) is a lack of Christian fellowship with other believers.  In the first year of so after I got saved, I did not attend church, and my spiritual life reflected that in stagnation.  To this day, my wife and I have struggled to find a good Bible-believing church to attend where we can be fed and grow in the Lord.  We have been going to a good church for about six months, but the pastor left in November.  He was a tremendously gifted preacher whose doctrine was solid and who preached in a life application manner.  In other words, his sermons almost always seemed to be about an area that I had been struggling with the previous week.  It's amazing how God gives us what we need, and Pastor Jim's sermons and strong leadership were exactly what this stubborn and somewhat wayward new Christian needed.

Unfortunately, we live in an area of the country that tends to be less open to outsiders.  Sadly, that has been our experience with the congregation of Pastor Jim's church and the congregation of the other church we attended for about six months.  People are friendly enough, but their primary fellowship is with the members of their immediate and extended families.  Kaylene is from out of town, and my family is not Christian, so that kind of leaves us high and dry in the fellowship department right now.  Kaylene has indicated that her church in Florida was not like this at all.  Those folks were very social and welcoming to newcomers.  After all, since most are from out of town, they have to rely on their local church for their primary relationships.  I found the members of her church in Florida to be extremely open and accepting of newcomers.

Let me say this: it is vitally important to have relationships with other believers.  This is why I would strongly recommend that you try to find a good Bible-believing church and start attending there.  If it meets your needs, you should become a member.  My unsaved brother scoffs at the notion of Christian fellowship (imagine hearing someone say "fellowship" while condescendingly surrounding the word with air quotes).  But, it is hugely IMPORTANT!  Jesus said that we must develop relationships with other believers.  This helps us grow in the way of the Lord while making us formally accountable to other Christians.  It also helps us develop a personal ministry for ourselves and shows us how to live as servants for Christ.  We serve God by serving the church first and then serve Him again by being a witness for Jesus to unbelievers around us (the "world").

If you want to get a good idea of the kind of church to look for, you might want to check out Rick Warren's book The Purpose Driven Church.  Our current church has implemented such a model, but I'm not sure if that will continue given that our pastor has moved on to another calling.  But, it will give you a good idea of what to look for in a church.  You should look for a church that is doctrinally solid -- in other words, a church that teaches the Bible and practices what it preaches.  Incidentally, to become a member, you will need to be baptized by full immersion in water.  If the church does not require it, then stay away from it!  That is a good indication that this church is not a Biblical church.  Another great resource to consult in your search for a church is a booklet published by Radio Bible Class ministries:

http://www.gospelcom.net/rbc/ds/rd951/rd951.html

I would recommend reading this booklet first.  I'll talk more about RBC ministries in a moment.

Another thing that was helpful to me was learning more about the facts and evidences for the Christian faith.  Though I accepted Jesus as my savior, I have struggled with things about the Christian faith that I did not understand.  Many things about it did not fit the worldview I had developed over the course of my life.  Also, I had learned a great deal of incorrect things about God as a result of my experience with Catholicism.  It has been a long process to systematically tear down those incorrect notions and replace them with the truth of God's Word.  But, thankfully, the Christian faith is an active, logical, and orderly faith reflective of God.  Truly, the Christian faith "makes sense" on an intellectual and heart level.

I have struggled with many things about the Christian faith.  In particular, I wrestled with the idea that Jesus was the one and only way to heaven.  I could not understand why God would not allow "good" people like Mother Theresa or Gandhi to go to heaven simply because they may not have accepted Christ as their Savior.  If this is a problem for you, I would direct you to the following booklet published by RBC ministries:

http://www.gospelcom.net/rbc/ds/q0605/q0605.html

This resource goes into detail why Jesus is the only way to God.  In general, I would highly recommend reading anything from RBC because this ministry is very Biblically solid, and you can learn a lot about questions on most any topic imaginable.  In particular, their Discovery Series Booklets have been extremely helpful to me.  Here is a link to that page:

http://www.gospelcom..net/rbc/ds/topics.html

They have an excellent daily devotional that I would strongly recommend.  The Our Daily Bread devotional gets you into the habit of reading the Bible every day and thinking about your faith:

http://www.gospelcom.net/rbc/odb/odb.shtml

Some other great resources that have been tremendously helpful to me in developing my faith, "working out your salvation" as the Apostle Paul calls it, have been books by respected Christian authors.  Here are some recommendations that I think you will find very beneficial and edifying:

The Case for Christ - by Lee Strobel

The Case for Faith - by Lee Strobel

A Love Worth Giving  - by Max Lucado

In The Grip of Grace - by Max Lucado

The Purpose Driven Life - by Rick Warren

Answers to Tough Questions Skeptics Ask about The Christian Faith - by Josh McDowell

Who Made God: And Answers to over 100 Other Tough Questions of Faith - edited by Ravi Zacharias and Norman Geisler

In particular, Max Lucado's books and devotionals have been extremely helpful to me in finding the heart of God.  I am one whose natural inclination is more toward legalism (following the letter of the law while ignoring the spirit of the law), so his books have been great in giving me a very balanced view of God and our relationship to Him.

In addition to RBC ministries, another terrific Internet resource I would recommend is an online ministry operated by Anne Elliott, my wife's sister-in-law:

http://www.anneshomeyplace.com/

Anne is an author, speaker, and teacher who has helped many others in the process of developing their faith.  She is one of the best personal resources my wife and I have, and she has been a big help to us in our spiritual lives.  Her website's Bible study group is currently doing a Bible study on the book of Proverbs.  

One thing that has helped me greatly is just reading the Bible on a regular basis.  I use the Life Application Study Bible (New King James Version), and it is an excellent resource because it includes commentary on most verses in the Bible down at the bottom of each page.  I would recommend a Bible study or devotional to read since it will show you how to get the most out of reading the Bible by being focused.  The Bible in total is the inspired and infallible word of God.  However, for the new Christian, it is very important to concentrate on the New Testament first.  The New Testament will help you to learn more about salvation, God's grace, and living the Christian life.  In time, you will see how it all fits together and how the Old Testament and New Testament relate.

Also, you should begin trying to memorize some Bible verses, which you can recall as needed.  Personally, I prefer using the New King James Version of the Bible, but other versions such as the New International Version are good also.  In no particular order, here are some of my favorite verses:

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. - John 3:16

Jesus said to him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me." - John 14:6

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. - Romans 8:28

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11

Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved. - Acts 4:12

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. - Hebrews 11:1

And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. - Galatians 6:9

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things. - Philippians 4:8

This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. - Psalm 118:24

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me." - Revelation 3:20

New believers should read 1 John several times.  It is also very helpful to become familiar with all of the gospels, especially John, which highlights God's divinity.  Personally, the gospel of Matthew is my favorite book of the Bible, especially chapter 7.

Finally, an area that I still struggle with is a consistent prayer life.  I am one who finds it very difficult to pray to God on a regular basis.  Occasionally, I believe that I am somehow not worthy of His attention.  Gradually, I have been able to accept the truth that God wants us to pray to Him, and not just when we want something, but on a consistent basis.  Think of God as your heavenly Father and speak to Him as if you were having a respectful conversation with your own earthly father.  He answers ALL prayers with the answer being "yes", "no", or "wait a while."  It is very important for you to confess your sins to Him on a regular basis so you can continue in an unhindered fellowship with Him.  This will also allow you to avoid being bogged down with unnecessary shame as God absolves you of your guilt through confession of sins.  Plus, praying will help you to find peace in life with its many changes and ups and downs.

I hope that these things will help you out.  As a fairly new Christian myself, I am still struggling with many things, but my spiritual life has grown quite a bit in recent times.  Do not worry or get discouraged because the Holy Spirit has started working in your heart.  As it says in Philippians 1:6:

"being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ..."

If you feed yourself a steady diet of His word in conjunction with consistent prayer, good Christian fellowship, and continued learning, you will find that these intense struggles will gradually subside, and your spiritual life will begin growing at a great pace. 

Thank you, Tom!  He has graciously agreed to let our readers e-mail him if they have any questions or would like to discuss some of these things further.  

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