It is very important that we not base God's will on experience. Instead we should base God's will on His Word. However, often God will reinforce His Word through an experience. Many times in the life of a believer, God will use a certain experience to teach His children a principle from His Word. We can grow in our spiritual life through experiences.

The phrase "life changing experience" sounds cliche but most of us have had them. Some experiences bring major changes to our lives and others bring very minor ones. Early in our marriage my husband and I invited guests over to our home. I was not used to entertaining and was very nervous. I wanted to be sure that I was a good hostess. I worked hard at cleaning the house from top to bottom (this was before we had children!) and I prepared the best meal I could on our very limited budget (my husband was a college student). Among the items on the menu I prepared was a jello salad. When we sat down, with our company, to eat I was very embarrassed to find that the jello was hard and lumpy. I learned later that this was a result of not having stirred the jello long enough while I was making it. This one experience has impacted me every time that I make jello. I stir it and stir it and stir it! The package says to stir it for two minutes but I always stir it at least for five even if we are not having company.

Obviously, how our jello turns out is really not that important but it is an example of how an experience caused me to do things differently. My husband and I have been married for sixteen years and, as have all couples who have been married any length of time, we have experienced many joys and heartaches along the way. These life experiences can help us to be more Christlike if we allow them to do so. 

Seven years ago we came close to losing my husband when he came down with juvenile diabetes and it went undiagnosed for a time. This experience helped me to realize that I had been taking him for granted for several years. I now appreciate each day that I have to spend with him. I asked my husband what situation, since we were married, has caused him the most spiritual growth. I expected him to say it was watching our son go through ten surgeries or losing eight children to miscarriage. One of those would have certainly been my answer. However, he responded not as a mother would, but as the head of the family and the provider would respond. He said it was during the times that we struggled most financially. There have been times in our marriage when we were "poor as church mice". We literally did not know how we would buy next week's groceries. We did not know how we would meet the next month's rent or house payment. On top of that, we had huge medical bills. However, we never went hungry and we always had a roof over our heads. It seemed that when we thought we were not going to be able to buy food that week the Lord put it on someone's heart to give us some money or my husband would get extra hours at work or someone would bring over a huge bag of sweet corn. My husband shared with me, that during these times he HAD to trust in God to meet our needs because that was the only way they were going to be met. 

One Thanksgiving our then three year old daughter was missing for a one hour period. We found her, safe and sound, but I still shudder when I think about the horror and terror that we experienced while she was missing. However, the Lord used the experience of temporarily losing our daughter to help me deal with a sin I have been struggling with for several years.

The Lord has also used positive experiences to help us to grow spiritually. Most of these experiences involved other people. Godly, wise Christians have imparted great biblical truths to us both by example and by formal teaching. Ministering to others and having others minister to us in times of need have also been a great encouragement to us as a family. Romans 3:28 and 29 says "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose". This verse has been an incredible source of encouragement to my husband and me. 

Many people become bitter against God when bad things happen in their life. Eleven years ago, after losing our third baby in a three year period, I also struggled with bitterness and anger towards God for several months. At that point in my life, I did not understand the goal of a believer. The goal of a Christian should not be "happiness" but to "glorify God". Joy will often follow if we have this goal but, even if it doesn't, that does not change our goal. Through every experience that God allows in our life, whether it be good or bad from our perspective, we can glorify Him if we choose to do so. We can grow spiritually in our joyful times and in our trials. We can minister to others during and after our own heartaches.

In every single situation in our life, God is with us. "I will never leave thee nor forsake thee." "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil for Thou art with me." There have been times in my life that I have felt that God is far away.

If you feel it would be an encouragement or a blessing to someone, you have the Stilwell's permission to forward this article in its entirety. They just ask that you include this note at the bottom of the article with their name and e-mail address (Jeff and Kim Stilwell, jkstilwell@juno.com) in case someone wishes to contact them. Thank you.

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